Love or Fun on the Side?

Dear Diary,
And e-mail in a forum:

I am a married woman with 4 kids. I have been married for 11 years to a man who doesn't show any responsibilities.
I am 30 years old now and have fallen in love with another guy who is also married with kids. We both know that this relationship cannot continue long term since both of us have our own families, but at the same time, we can't ignore the deep love we felt for each other. We have met 3 times and I can't break it up just like that because my feelings will kill me.

Answer:
If you want to continue with the affair, be prepared to lose your husband and children and suffer the consequences of your behaviour. This man probably provoked your latent feelings of sexuality and adventure. It must feel so exciting, exhilarating and thrilling to enjoy a relationship on the sly. Perhaps this guy is also suffering from marriage fatigue. Sharing a romantic interlude without commitment or obligation must feel wonderfully liberating.

However, there is too much hurt and pain involved if you both selfishly decided to carry on. Don't be fooled or seduced by your feelings now. If you marry your lover, life will probably go the same way. There will be the children to care for, the house to clean, as you continue to be wife and mother.

An affair is never a solution. If your marriage is the problem, then think of ways to improve your relationship with your husband. Enjoy your children and do not see them as responsibilities. Do not fall into a trap of guilt and regrets because it is more difficult to salvage love betrayed.